August 30, 2012

When someone doesn't like your dog

All my blogger friends will hopefully forgive me being more or less absent, but I have a good excuse: my mama came to visit!

Mama lives so far away that she only stops by once a year or so. Last time she visited we did not have Relay and I was more than a little nervous about the introduction. I mentioned before that I was raised without dogs,  but more to the point, my mother was raised to view dogs as scavengers, pest ridden, and troublesome. Her first impression of my dog was him asleep in the back seat hammock.

As we were driving home, I received a panicked phone call from a neighbor who found herself in a pinch and needed someone to watch her little poodle. Izzy is one of Relay's best friends, so normally it wouldn't have been much trouble, but instead my nervousness doubled. Little as she was, Izzy was a wild child and brought out the spunk in my otherwise calm and easy going mutt. 

I tried to show off Rely's good manners, his calm nature, his gentle and loving spirit. We did his tricks and especially juxtaposed to his rebellious friend, he was very well trained and behaved. Izzy barked, jumped, had accidents in the house, she stole treats, became territorial with toys just because, had separation anxiety, and was in non stop "go" mode. Unfortunately, none of this worked in my pup's favor. Mama simply didn't like my dog. I really was shocked to hear that she didn't think he was good looking, because though I'm partial, I really think my baby is handsome. Although he is only 38 pounds, he was "way too big" in her opinion.
It stung. But what hurt more was that after a few days, Mama started to warm up to Izzy. By the end of the visit her preference was so pronounced even Relay noticed. I allowed myself a full evening to be upset about it, and then I let it go. Of course she would like Izzy, they are both two little petite mischief makers, loud with non stop energy. And Izzy would not hear of anyone not loving her. She makes friends like a bulldozer, you really can't stop her.

Looking at these pups, I would choose my mutt again and again. I don't need outside validation to tell me he's wonderful, he proves it to me every day. Maybe he will win Mama over but if not, oh well. I still love him.


11 comments:

While it's good that your mom finally warmed up to a dog - any dog is a great thing to change her thinking - I'm sure it stung that she didn't think Relay was handsome! Don't worry - we all see his handsomeness (how can you not see it?) and you know it, so that's all that counts!

Aww, I'm sorry. I know that hurt. (If I ever told you some of the things my mom has said about my dog, your hair would fall out. ;)

I agree with Blueberry's human, though, Relay is a great, and great-looking, dog. We all have our preferences in what we want in a dog. Isn't it wonderful they come in such a variety of 'flavors' then? I like big dogs, my husband likes little dogs. I like hounds, my dad liked Terriers.

On the bright side, I bet you never thought your mom would warm up to any dog, so you know, there's hope. :)

In the meantime, stick with us and we'll ooh and ahh over Relay enough to make you blush. ;)

My parents won't even come to my house anymore. How sad is that? They don't like my dogs or cats... well they like Harry but that's it. They COMPLETELY disapprove of my revolving door as a volunteer with Dogs for Autism. Oh well, too bad for them I say.

I love my parents but my dogs understand me.

Mamma Heartbeat

This is totally what I needed to hear. Thanks everyone!

Blueberry's human, I will try to look at it like a small victory of sorts.
Leslie, I think I was shamelessly fishing for compliments, and thank you for delivering, lol.
Momma Heartbeats, what you are doing rocks and you should be incredibly proud of the difference you're making.

Sorry to see that I'm not the first to have less than supportive family, but thanks everyone for listening to me vent.

What a shame. I think your mother missed out. I love Relay. But, I am a medium to large dog person. I guess the good thing is that she actually didn't dislike both dogs. I assume she still loves you right? :)

I really am sorry she didn't like Relay. Clearly, he was under-appreciated.

Well, I have to say I'm quite touchy about that too - they all ought to love my babies, right? For many people, criticizing their dog = criticizing their child.

But at the end, people are entitled not to like my dogs, just as they are entitled not to like me. People usually have their reasons for their likes and dislikes, reasons we might know nothing about.

My mom-in-law "likes" our guys - on photographs. Doesn't have any desire to come anywhere near our dogs, or anybody else's dogs. She doesn't want to dirt, the germs, the who knows what.

Nothing I can do about it, but she surely doesn't get to see me often.

I'm so sorry. Isn't it so weird to realize people don't like dogs. I was just thinking about that today. I'm sorry your Mom didn't fall head over heels for Relay (which I would have wanted too if it were me). I think he's ADORABLE!! ~Lyvonne (letsbepets.com aka twitter @eilbp)

I feel your pain! Kirby really saved my life and yet I have two grown children who refer to him as "the dog". They never read my blog or go to his FB Page. They also think I've basically lost my mind because I foster dogs. Ive accepted It's what it is so this post made me feel better. Thanks for writing it!

What matters to Relay is your love so just keep on doing what you're doing!

OUCH! I must say, if someone doesn't like my dogs, they rarely remain in my life in any kind of meaningful capacity. My dogs go almost everywhere with me, if you don't enjoy them, you won't much enjoy time with me. It would be really hard to get away with that with your Mama though and I can absolutely understand why that would sting. With all due respect, she must be blind though, as you're right, Relay is exceptionally handsome! It's totally obvious.

Since Relay can't blush I will do so for him. Thanks everyone. I know that our pup and our fosters are a big part of our lives now, it's still a bit of an adjustment when that isn't readily accepted. But I will not take it personally and try to move on.

Awww.... bummer that your Mama didn't warm up to your pup. I guess it's a good sign that she started to warm up to any dog. It can be hard for people who didn't grow up with dogs to do that.

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